Strand Theory is this: I purport that there is a distinct relationship between the way one approaches pruning their bushes and an emotional attachment to the very strands of hair on one’s head. This is not junk science folks. I shall set about to prove my theory with actual case studies. You may be shocked, if not shocked amused. I shall provide further substantiation to this discourse to trimming said locks and giving the bushes a healthy whack with the hedge trimmers. For those of you too young to remember
Hair: The American Tribal Love-Rock Musical defined an age that sparked much comment and controversy. It opened off-Broadway October of 1967, and on Broadway in April of 1968 and ran for 1,750 performances! Some of the songs from its score became Top 10 hits and a feature film adaptation was released in 1979. A Broadway revival opened March 31, 2009 earning strong reviews and winning the Tony Award and Drama Desk award for best revival musical. In 2008 Time magazine wrote “Hair seems, if anything, more daring than ever.”
“Where are you going with this Gaga?” We are going to talk about pruning and how our emotions are related to how we approach pruning. Folks with serious control issues put a big hurt on their bushes, there I’ve said it. Here’s an example of a crepe myrtle murder right next to this paragraph and a link explaining how severe pruning can seriously harm the life of your plant. We are going to talk about pruning and moderation in all things. It’s almost spring and I am under an obligation to urge restraint or at best moderation.
The Grumpy Gardener, Steve Bender has the best article on pruning Crepe Myrtles I’ve found in his article called Crepe Myrtle Pruning Step-By Step published online by Southern Living. This is the way to go about the correct way to prune these beautiful hard wood “trees” so they will flourish.
When I moved to Texas I was informed the last hard freeze was President’s Day.
What an expensive lesson. I pruned all 200 roses around President’s Day, planted 19 new bushes and left on a trip to CA in early March. I returned to something I have never seen before. Temperatures had dropped to 8 degrees with a northeast wind. The new spring leaves on the NE side of all the trees had frozen and died. I lost all 19 new bushes. and all the new growth on the older bushes had frozen on the canes and rotted. It’s the only year in all my years of rose growing I had to re-prune all 200 bushes.
I have learned there is more to that quote my mother used to say “beauty knows no pain,” and waiting patiently has its rewards. Pruning roses in Chicago was easy. The canes usually had to be pruned back fairly hard. In Texas you have the choice of pruning moderately and boy do we have dialog about pruning. But I can tell you there are witnesses to pruning wars around here about whether to prune light, moderate or severe. I usually choose moderate pruning. And I wait now until the last possible chance of a drastic hard freeze can come through. I promised to prove my theory so here goes.
Life long friend Nancy confirms my theory about pruning her bushes as therapy. When she feels like she wants to take control she gets the hedge trimmers and “gets after” her bushes. Please reference this very blog ‘Haunted By The Ghosts of Plants You’ve Killed With Kindness” https://gagasgarden.com/?p=146
The offender in the above referenced post is an accountant. Now this lovely well intentioned lady not only ripped this rose bush out of the ground and pruned it she just decided to start trimming the roots. Lovely readers, I don’t have any credentials as a psychologist but do you see a pattern here? Any thoughts of control issues, maybe?
Imagine how giddy I was to see these lyrics from Hair? lol
They’ll be ga ga at the go go
When they see me in my toga
My toga made of blond
My hair like Jesus wore it
Hallelujah I adore it